Trigger Warning *****************I just want to fucking die. Kill. Myself. Over and out. Straight up. Too bad I don't believe in suicide. Too bad I'd rather live in perpetual torture. Too bad death is too easy of an out for me. Too bad ED says I must live. I just want to feel. All the... Continue Reading →

Self Harm

As adept as I think I am with words I can never quite express my feelings and emotions in a practical way that helps others understand what I am experiencing. But these words, on this post, explain it exactly.

If you think I cut for attention, or to get sympathy, you are very, very wrong. Think I should just stop? Just get over it? If it were that simple I would.

Please, PLEASE, Read this post, and think about what you say and how you react the next time you find out someone cuts or self harms.


Trigger warning.

This is probably my most serious blog to date. I am going to discuss something many of you may not have heard of, hopefully not seen, hopefully not done. But should be aware of and I want you to understand why and not to judge.

If you are going to leave any comments on this Post, and I hope you do. Supportive only please. 

I hope when you have read this, you understand more.

The first part of this post is to bring awareness to what is happening in shadows. Possibly a bit why, and to provide an understanding, hopefully to eliminate judgement.

Later in the blog, I hope to offer something to the long sleeves. I say that with compassion, not ridicule. I don’t ridicule or judge. I am empathetic, I feel what you feel.

Ok there is a lot of confusion now, I am sure.

Self harm, what is…

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Educate Yourself

I received an email from Aldo Baker that brought this to my attention and as I have looked it over I thought that it would something worth my time to share.  So many people think that mental illness is strictly a thought process or problem of the mind, not a physical thing, and that is just... Continue Reading →


Last time I cut myself? 2 days ago because my husband had to be right. Again. One bite-mark/bruise left arm right above wrist. Eight new scratches/cuts to the right arm. Same place as always. New scissors. I could feel the skin tear; hear it too. But at least the anger is gone.

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