I suppose I should write something witty, but I can't think of anything thanks to all this brain fog. I should be working on my church and state essay, but I'm a glutton for punishment so I am procrastinating. I am home because my neck and back hurt so bad I could barely function as... Continue Reading →
Saw a homeless man walk by me today. Shuffling along, Lighter dangling in one hand. Pants holy and ripped to shreds Wearing a coat in unseasonable weather. And I thought, "Where does he come from? Where is he going?" And then I watched as he looked through a can of trash, Obviously hungry. And I... Continue Reading →
****TRIGGER WARNING**** I am not going to eat today. It was a hard day yesterday and an even harder night. I self harmed for the first time in months and my husband saw it. He was not happy. I didn't care. I deserved it. I deserved more, but wasn't left alone to do it. Yesterday... Continue Reading →
*****Trigger Warning***** I am utterly, and totally, alone. My eating disorder is in complete control and I am helpless to stop him. The doctor and dietician told me I have to do it on my own because insurance wouldn't approve treatment, but I cannot. The eating disorder is overwhelmingly strong, and I don't know how... Continue Reading →
This article really spoke to me. Many of the thoughts expressed herein are thoughts I struggle with on a regular basis. I hope to someday have the strength to overcome these thoughts and aspire to reach recovery even though it feels so out of reach at this time..... "I don’t know many people with eating... Continue Reading →
I want to scream. I sit silent. I want to yell. I smile. I want to live. I fade away.
June 13, 2016: I wrote this 5 months ago. Right before I went on this hiatus I have been on for most of the year. And this, this is why.......... ******************************* Let's be honest. Right now I could give two shits less about anything. I am only writing to process all of this crap in... Continue Reading →