Weighed myself last night and internally teared up.
I had already decided to fast most of Saturday because I wasn’t happy where I was, but I couldn’t get out of eating at the wedding reception…believe me, I tried.
So today I ate some breakfast and decided that was that. I’ll just be miserable and fat, cuz that’s where I’m headed.
I have a target weight to be at before (if) I head off to treatment (for the fucking third time) and if I’m not there I believe I’ll just delay going til I am. I’m just going to have to lose it again when I get home anyway.
Ugh. I 10/10 DONT recommend having an eating disorder.