I’m Not Going to Go

I should be crying

I know what I’m doing is wrong

I’m only hurting myself

By apologizing

Accepting all blame

But I can’t do anything right

It’s all wrong

Everything I do is wrong

Why can’t I cry

It’s numbness

All my insides

Black and dark and dank and moldy

Not a ray of sunlight shining in

My version of the truth is a lie

All lies

Forever poisoning my mind

I’m all fucked up

I deserve to die

I deserve the pain of knowing the truth and lying to keep you sane

I’m a fucking moron

Why can’t I stop

I poison everything

This is all my fault

I just want to stop

Don’t stand up for yourself you fucking dumb cunt

Everything you know is wrong

Put on your fucking face

Get your shit together

You don’t matter

You never did

You never will

I fucking hate you

You only fuck shit up

You bring it all on yourself

Carry that weight inside

Like a lead brick

Feel that sinking pit

That knot and that hole

That’s where your heart once was

That’s where the emotions go

That’s where I’m living from now on

You better fucking believe I’m not going to go

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