My daughter was sick once last night and had a bad stomach all night and most of today.
I find myself unable to speak the word or even write it for fear of a repeat night tonight.
Granted, last night was not bad compared to previous experiences and I’d much rather have last night again if given a choice between the two, but I am still finding myself fearful; to the point of paranoia.
Paranoid of touching stuff she has touched (even thought I have made her wash & rewash her hands) and then touching my eyes, or nose, or mouth, or face in general.
Paranoid of the two younger girls and my husband doing the same; of sharing germs.
While I washed the dishes I found myself wondering if germs drown in water or if I need to soap and re-soap and let it rinse under scalding hot water for 5 minutes. Did I get the germs off??
I’m sooo tired, but I am afraid to get ready for bed. I feel like I need to stay dressed—prepared—for the next thing.
At least they are all in bed now so I can’t badger them about how they are feeling & what does that mean?? & what does that mean?? No, it’s either one or the other.
Poor things. I see it in their eyes, they don’t know what to say—what I want them to say. I don’t know what I want them to say either.
There doesn’t seem to be a right answer.